Autism and Asperger's - Hear a sibling's perspective

Autism and Asperger's - Hear a sibling's perspective

Siblings of people with autism are anything but typical. They have wisdom beyond their years. They have a real understanding of what it means to be different. They have learned to compromise, negotiate and are the future social workers and great psychologists of our time.

We interviewed a nine-year-old boy about what it's like to have a brother with Asperger's syndrome. His answers were profound and we were impressed by his clarity of the situation. Many parents with children on the autism spectrum are concerned about the impact of the disorder on siblings. Adam Aviram, a small child, put everything into perspective. He eloquently lets us know what it's like to have a ten-year-old brother with Asperger's syndrome.

What is typical of Asperger's is that his brother Dean Aviram (10 years old) has a passion. He loves history. He probably knows more than most adults and has extensive conversations about world leaders and past events. Adam, on the other hand, enjoys playing soccer and playing Wii in his free time. When it comes to playing with his brother, he tells us they like to exchange information. He proudly announced that he and his brother are working on building a time machine. This may not be a typical children's game, but Adam doesn't mind. When asked how he thinks the pair would play differently if his brother didn't have Asperger's, he imagines it would be so different he can't possibly imagine.

Adam says he and his brother are really good friends. When asked “What’s the best thing about Asperger’s?” He doesn't miss a beat. He doesn't have to remember things because he knows his brother will. We agree that this must be pretty handy. When asked “What’s frustrating about Asperger’s syndrome?” He lets us know that his brother loves the computer, and it's hard to stop him when Adam wants to have fun instead.

If you ask an adult to describe Asperger's, you'll likely get a detailed or perhaps a technical explanation. But Adam Aviram, with his 9-year-old wisdom, just tells it like it is. “Aspergers is a type of autism and it makes it difficult for people to have a good conversation with other people.” We certainly can't argue with that!

When asked if he thinks his friends notice anything different about his brother, he says "yes." But it doesn't bother him and they don't ask for details. However, they are curious as to why Adam enjoys hanging out with children on the autism spectrum during school lunch. He then explains that he helps people and that he is interested because his brother has Asperger's Syndrome. Like many children with siblings on the autism spectrum, Adam goes above and beyond. He proves that he is not only an excellent brother, but also an advocate for people with autism and perhaps a pioneer of our time.

Parents are concerned about family dynamics and the responsibilities a child must bear when their sibling has autism. However, you can take comfort in the fact that siblings are resilient, open-minded and accept the situation as it is.

Inspired by Jene Aviram